Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Best of 2009!

It's been the year of the vampires, comic-books, and Sci-Fi! We've reviewed hundreds of this year's cinema and DVD releases and here's our top you can see we loved the Sci-Fi scene!

10. Watchmen


A fan boys dream. True to the comics in tone, cast and look. And the soundtrack is brilliant! Snyder's done it again.

9. Mesrine


Part 1 of this French crime epic is episodic but moves like a missile & every scene is riveting. Part 2 of this gangster epic is a blinder with more bank jobs,prison breaks & a staggeringly sublime Cassell.

8. The Hangover


Depraved, debauched & outrageous.A daring comedy with cracking script & characters from largely unknown cast.Vegas anyone?

7. Drag Me To Hell


Staples in the eye,maggots in the mouth, a scary old woman & a talking goat.What more do you want?

6. Slumdog Millionaire


Frantic,frenzied & exhilarating.Boyle hits the streets of Mumbai to deliver a heartfelt colourful & infectious ride

5. Avatar


This fantasy epic fully immerses you into a new world with breathtaking skill & pioneering visuals. An awe-inspiring landmark.

4. Star Trek


Abrams hits Warp Factor X for a reboot & it pays spades. Trekkies & newcomers rejoice-Kirk & co are back..& cool again

3. Moon


Think Castaway meets Silent Running: this elegant & assured British sci-fi is slow but totally captivating with a superb Rockwell

2. District 9


A brilliant and original take on 'first contact'. Cutting edge visuals that make you not only believe, but care.

1. The Hurt Locker


Out of nowhere comes the best war film in ages about a bomb disposal unit in Iraq.Vivid,volatile & uncontrollably tense.

And ten of the worst...

10. He's Just Not That Into You

The all-star cast can't save this confused adaptation. Poorly paced with an insufferable ending. Avoid

9. Gran Torino

Clint is hilarious but can’t save a weak story with terrible acting. Full of laughable moments that aren’t deliberate.

8. Year One
An uninspired muddled comedy -at times biblically bad with only a few quirky laughs thanks to Cera. Life of Brian this is not.

7. Saw VI

A repugnant, redundant film full of hateful characters with no scares or thrills. When will this annual pain end?

6. Push

A miserable heroes ripoff lacking the charm or fun and played out by an awful cast, one of whom thinks he's Samuel L Jackson.

5. Funny People

The makers of edgy US gross-out try mixing penis jokes with serious grown-up stuff. It's awkward and sadly, not funny.

4. Transformers 2

Big, loud, long & dumb. The sound & visuals- like the robots(& Megan Fox) are out of this world but the story is a mess.

3. Taking Woodstock
Lee's nostalgic look at an iconic hippie 60s moment is lackluster & dull. Hollow in content with bland performances.1. Babylon A.D

2. Babylon A.D

A sci-fi mess with decayed script & abysmal finale.1 or 2 guilty pleasure moments for Diesel fans but it's no Pitch Black.

1. The Ugly Truth
Butler is the only decent thing in this glaringly unfunny & banal romcom. The ugly truth is that this film is terrible.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Terminator Salvation: the perils of 12A

Terminator Salvation: the perils of 12A

10 Second Reviews have just watched Terminator Salvation. One of the most exciting prospects of 2009 and the start of a reboot to a twenty-year-old sci-fi franchise that could be here to stay.

It was a great film:

"Terminator Salvation: 7/10. An explosive war film sprinkled with Teminator magic. Bale's intense, Worthers is hard and Arnie is pointless!" From our Twitter.

It was enjoyable with some of the best CGI, make up (if they even use make up anymore?) and action I've ever seen on the big screen. But for all it's explosions and gun fights; it just didn't feel like a Terminator film. And I reckon I know why.

It was only 12A.

What does 12A mean well:

"12A – Suitable for 12 years and over. No-one younger than 12 may see a ‘12A’ film in a cinema unless accompanied by an adult." From BBFC

It also means:

"Able to be watched by just about any little kid as long as they've got the cold hard cash to pay for the film, merchandise and Planet Hollywood theme park ticket." From Me.

If we look at the very high tech and Cyberdyne Systems-esq timeline here we can see my point:

Terminator is a brilliant franchise but it simply doesn't work as a 12A. 15 is fine - T1 bought us fear and T2 bought us awe (and fear). But T3 was a 12A and so shit it bought us anger and this latest film bought us kids and lots of them.

If the stories are told well like in T1 and T2 then it's heavy on the philosophy and heavy on the fear and violence. When these things get opened up to a whole new audience you end up pandering to them so we get horrible cheese like in T3 or massive amounts of over explanation to the point of patronising in T4.

Salvation is a good film but once again the dreaded 12A has diluted a brilliant franchise. Yes it means a whole new generation of fans, but inevitably the story-telling has suffered.

Joe (of joe and matt fame.)

Monday, May 4, 2009

The April Roundup

The good, the bad and the ones that caused arguments in April...


The best new film we saw this month:


State of Play


A blistering thriller adapted from the BBC series. Affleck doesn't fit but Crowe is terrific. A gripping, intelligent romp.

Agree with us?


The best 3 films we saw this month:




Spielberg's first blockbuster is a true adventure. A horror, detective and chase film melted together by Williams' iconic score.



Horrendous and haunting. A necessary journey into a shameful part of our history honestly told and intelligently shot.

Cast Away


Hanks commands the screen all on his own as Zemeckis' risks pay off to deliver an emotional rollercoaster of a survival story


The worst 3 films we saw this month:


The Sentinel


Entertaining & slick score but strange edits, odd slow-mos & ultimately underwhelming. Jack Bauer can't even save this 1



Even witty dialogue
between Roberts and Owen can't pull together the plot; too long by half. Giamatti top as always.

Mighty Joe Young


This Dinseyfied King Kong flop starts well with a realistic Joe but loses all momentum with poor acting & banal script


And the one that we couldn't agree on...


The Thomas Crown Affair (1999)


A film as smooth and slick as it's subject. Playful and pacy but with a few too many montages!